Okay, so I’m only 5’5″ but I have never really had a problem with my height. It’s other people who have a problem with it. All those years when I was dating, girls would tell me I was cute, a hottie, funny, smart and great to be with. There was just this one thing: they said I was too short. Even girls shorter than me thought I was too short! They want a 6 foot plus man. Seriously? Okay, but be forewarned, you won’t see him much. There will be no gazing in his big brown eyes unless he’s on his knees and a man will only get on his knees once in a lifetime. Kissing is always awkward with the two of you straining your necks in weird, painful positions. Do you really wanna make out with a giraffe? Even dancing won’t be romantic if you are constantly staring at that red stain on the bottom of his tie. (is that lipstick?)
You will also have to keep asking him: “How’s the weather up there?” since it won’t be the same from where you are standing. What do you do if your weather is calm but his is stormy and you can’t even see it?
I know a lot of women feel safer with a taller dude. I get it. (sort of) But it’s a myth that all short men are weaklings. Have you ever noticed that it’s usually the smaller dog that’s the most ferocious? I’ve seen Great Danes and German Shepherds shake life a leaf and piddle on the floor in the waiting room at the vet’s. So, do you want a small dog that is mean enough to guard your property or a huge baby that sits on your lap and likes his belly rubbed? My bark may be worse than my bite, but when it comes to protecting the woman I love, you all better get the hell out of the way if you know what’s good for you!
There are advantages to being on the smaller side. We make great firefighters since we can fit through small windows and other confining spaces. I mean, if you’re trapped in a burning building, would you rather have a short dude who can climb in easily and quickly like a monkey, or a big dude that can’t fit and his long legs get in the way? Take your pick. Remember, seconds count.
Then there’s the myth that big and tall guys have bigger appendages. If you believe that or if it’s something your mother told you, I have news for you: it’s not true and your mother lied! Yes, your own mother! Shocking! Anyway, does size really matter or is it knowing how to use what you’ve got? Let’s just say shorter guys are more agile and versatile in bed in ways that tall guys could only dream of.
Taller guys are better at sports? Who told you that? I may not be able to reach the basketball hoop, but I bet I can jump higher.
Ladies, do yourselves a favor and get a shorter man. (unless you’re 6 foot tall) They say that the eyes are the windows to one’s soul and you’ll be able to look into his and know if he’s lying. Wouldn’t that be great? You can look straight into his eyes and ask him if he’s having an affair. Woo Hoo! You go, girl!
Besides, who wants trips to the chiropractor for a sore neck?